A moment of Glee

OK, so now is the time when I raise my hand, stand up, and say, "My name is Jennifer, and I LOVE the TV show "Glee." It is this perfect mix of edgy wit, colorful characters, and inappropriate sarcasm. These qualities appeal to my grown-up self who feels like if I can catch all of the witticisms, get them, and laugh out loud, then my brain has not gone totally to mush from too many hours zoning out in a cubicle. But more than that, there is the singing.

So it's corny and cliche, but I was one of those misfit Glee club kids. Granted, choir wasn't quite so taboo at my high school. No one threw slushies in my face or deposited me in the dumpster every morning, but neither did singing write my ticket to popularity or acceptance. But I can relate to that moment, on stage, singing, when I knew I was doing something special that not very many of my classmates had the courage to do. I sang solos, I sang with the choir, I sang in a small quintet, and I had a lead in a musical. Every time I had the chance to do those things, I felt a surge of energy; I could almost feel my body and my face change. It was like a jolt of pure happiness, powerful enough erase teenage angst and low self-esteem. I felt so hopeful and alive; I had the power to do something great and to affect the people around me.

The problem is that there aren't any adult show choirs. We trudge through the day and get the job done, but there is nothing that ever compares to the elation of belting out music with all your heart. We give those moments to our kids and students as gifts, and we say we're too old or those times are over for us. But why? Why couldn't we gather together and sing a great Journey song and feel special and happy and energized? Just FEEL anything?

I think we give up too early on having a Gleeful life. We get caught up in routine and expectations and responsiblities, and we forget how great it feels to do something just for the sheer joy of it. Like singing a song. Will singing change the world? Nope. But it sure does feel great when the harmonies line up and the choreography clicks and you think, "man, I LOVE this song!" There is a quote from last week's episode from Glee about how one can really provide for your family. Is it about money or is it about teaching them that the most important thing is living your life doing something you're passionate about? I was passionate about choir and music when I was in high school, and that passion and feeling got me through the routine and the necessary responsibilities. Singing made me feel special, which helped me get through the times I felt invisible. I have to think that I should keep using what music inspires in me to get through the hard times now. Watching that silly TV show reminded me of the feeling of joy that it gives me. I want to get back there.

So I am going to start singing along with my favorite songs in my car, LOUDLY. I am going to blast the iPod while I'm cleaning the house and use my feather duster as a fake microphone and my vacuum cleaner as a dance partner. I am going to go to more concerts, and I will stand up and sing and dance and annoy everyone around me who doesn't have the courage or the spirit to do the same. I am going to give myself up to that feeling of being alive. It's time for some Glee for me. I can't believe I forgot about it.